Today I turn 55. Here's what I've been learning lately.

Take your meds. Accept your age and your limits and your need for help. People who care about you want you to take care of yourself so they can enjoy having you in the world as long as possible.

Play more. Invite others, and accept the invitations you get. A playful exchange can be just a few seconds, or a whole week. Don't miss out on the little ones while you're waiting for the big ones.

Habits, routines, rituals. These are the scaffolding of your life, and the value compounds. Motivation is highly overrated. More than anything, your habits are your life, so build ones you like. You'll be in motion before you have time to overthink. Then tough things aren't as tough, and good things are even better. Start, keeping starting, and the finishing will take care of itself.

Help someone feel better every day. Reinforce the things they like about themselves. Reframe or ignore the things they don't. If they begin sharing, invite them to tell you more, and then just listen. It doesn't take much, but we all want to be noticed and heard.

Say what you think you want, but know that you'll probably be wrong. Say it again. You'll get a little closer. Tell others, listen how it changes, and keep your antenna tuned to how you feel when you say it. Keep saying it, and over time you'll slowly circle towards the truth. All the while, be open to finding something you didn't expect but that turns out to be what you always wanted. 

See the deep beauty in challenge and the uncertain. Without challenge, boredom shows up faster than most realize. And who wants to know their whole story before it happens?

Don't ever wish a day (a week, a year) was over. Time is the most precious of non-renewable resources. We get what we get, and no more. However, if you're ever feeling like you want to start over, then stop, i-n-h-a-l-e, e-x-h-a-l-e, reset, and start over. Don't wait.

1 + One. Zoom all the way in to the individual, and we're all unique, autonomous, and separate. Zoom all the way out to humanity, and we're all the same, interdependent, and together. The great dance of life is being true to both of those.

Share what you know. That's how we ended up here with running water and lights and cars and grocery stores and internet, instead of naked in a jungle in the middle of the night. People before us learned something, and then shared it, discussed it, improved it, bit by bit. It all adds up.

Better people have bigger problems. Why? When you improve yourself, you are better. When you are better, you can handle more things. When you can handle more things, you notice more things that need help handling. Better people have bigger problems.

Here's to trying to be more better, and solving bigger problems! I can't wait to see what's next.

2020 was a year of highs and lows, like any year. And, like any year, I like to frame it as going from high-to-high, rather than from low-to-low. Same path, but better memories. Am I just being tone deaf and ignoring all the suffering of the year? Nope. When the pandemic hit I had already been unemployed for 8 months. I eventually just stopped looking. My wife was laid off for months. I didn't get to see my young grandson even once. We missed annual gatherings with family and friends, some of which for the first time ever. 
 
But we all know about that, and much worse. However, it can be easy to forget about the good stuff. I find that when I focus on what I have, instead of what I don't have, every day is better. So, here's my personal list of why 2020 was awesome...
 

• Reruns of old shows, because I’m old enough to remember before streaming, before DVDs, before videotapes, there was a time when if you missed it, you missed it. 
• Slowing down enough to re-learn how to cook, to ride my bike every day through the state park, to walk to get the mail, to breathe slower, to appreciate more, to be in the moment. 
• I learned how to cut my own hair, and not a buzz cut either. Actual scissors. 
• My wife landed her favorite job ever. She works at a small charter airline, and has regular contact with planes, helicopters, and even minor celebrities. Plus, she loves her co-workers, and they think she’s awesome too.  
• My daughter completed her Bachelor's in Mechanical Engineering, with minors in Biology and Biochemistry and a concentration in Bioengineering Applications and Pre-med. Plus, Cum Laude, Sobey Scholar, and she was inducted into a leadership honor society that only accepts 1% of the students every year!
• My brother and his partner launched their Tru-Tone authentic color LED Christmas lights, got rave reviews, and they sold out in a few weeks. 
• Baby Yoda, because Baby Yoda!
• I invented a new game - Disc Golf Biathlon. It’s like the Olympic event which combines cross-country skiing and target shooting, except this combines running and 36 holes of disc golf played as fast as possible. 
• I discovered networked notes, or software that links notes with other notes (in both directions). For a compulsive notetaker and thinker like me, this discovery was pure gold. 
• I played Dungeons & Dragons every week with my youngest son and six of his friends from around the country. One long and several mini adventures, and great social time with some really funny and clever people. 
• I got to drive an Audi TT for the first time. It’s been my dream car for 20 years. 
• My unsolicited music video celebrating friendships was used to close out the 2020 Virtual Chicago Pinball Expo. 
• I discovered the band Gloryhammer and their trilogy of albums. It’s a super-cheesy, super-fun epic symphonic metal romp with songs like “The Unicorn Invasion of Dundee”. It actually inspired me to develop a Gloryhammer good & evil pinball machine concept I think is actually unique in the industry.
• A grant application was approved to create a museum to honor my great grandfather’s Shelby Bicycle Co.
• I found a partner that would like to combine my wooden toy design with a learning system they are developing. 
• I looked forward to group video calls several times a week with deep thinkers around the globe. I’ve chatted with people in Ohio, Florida, Oregon, California, Minnesota, New York, British Columbia, Toronto, Germany, UK, Switzerland, France, Italy, Hungary, Belgium, Holland, New Zealand, and Australia.
• Because of the personal responsiveness and encouragement of world-class strength coach Dan John, I rebooted my minimalist garage gym strength training. I’m now physically stronger than I’ve ever been (and I keep records, so I know).
• I discovered the brilliant Systems Thinking work of Derek and Laura Cabrera, connected with them personally, and the way I think about things has forever changed. 
• I made massive progress on what might be my magnum opus - Thinking Skills for Kids. It’s been accelerating for the last six months. For most of December I was waking up in the middle of the night and working for an hour or two. My new framework, toolset, and teaching method integrates things I’ve been working on since 1995 - 25 years! This will be out in the world in 2021.
• I started Moehr Better LLC, a company of one. 
• I built a “Days Until Broke” spreadsheet based on a common tech startup model. It tracks Total Available Cash divided by Average Daily Spend for the last 30 days. That gives us a single number (updated monthly) that turned our finances into a game that we actually started to win. 
• I made the last payment on my car. My wife made the last payment on her car. Wow. Free and clear. 
• With the support of family and friends and coworkers, we’ve been given gifts of food and freelance work, money and medicine, appreciation and meaning. Old friends were faithful. New friends were grateful. 

 
Was it tough going at times? Sure thing. But I won’t let that overshadow all the good that happened. I can’t wait for what’s next. Happy New Year!

Have you ever struggled when communicating the specs for a small project? Sure, it's easy to pick a deadline, but is the date just a loose ballpark, nice but negotiable, or event-driven and critical? What about level of creativity required, or detailing?

I built my Expectation Abacus to help with that. With the rise in remote working, I thought it might be helpful to share a tool that can quickly capture and negotiate the "softer specs" of a project. Feel free to share and adapt. 

http://www.moehrbetter.com/expectation-abacus.html

​For that setup, I had a digital side…

​...and an analog side.

​My current work-from-home setup is still pretty rigged, but functionally it’s the best I’ve had, and it works great.

The key is to have the heights right. You should have your eyes about even with the top of your screen (just like when sitting down), and your elbows should be about 90 degrees with your forearms not quite touching the desktop (just like when sitting down). Your shoulders should be relaxed, not shrugged. It’s worth the time to make little adjustments to make it fit you, and not the other way around.  
 
This is the mat I stand on - Topo by Ergodriven. I love it because the varied surface gives my feet and legs lots of different positions to play with. I’m either in minimalist shoes, or barefoot. I’ve had it for about 5 years, and it has zero wear. Totally worth the $100. 
 
I’d eventually like to build this awesomely simple adjustable desk. I bought the plans for $30, but it might be beyond my woodworking skill. Certain parts have to be dead on. We'll see, but it's just so cool I might have to try. 
 
Someday I’d like to add a HON Perch stool.

And, when I make my first million, it will be the ultimate, a 2-level glass-topped EvoDesk.
​
I know having a standing desk isn’t for everyone. But for me, it helps my posture, my feet feel strong and healthy, and I’m more mentally alert. Plus, according to the site StandUp Kids, I’ve also burned 707,000 calories more than I would have sitting in my chair for 10 years. No wonder I can eat so much. :)